December 3, 2020

The Editor speaks: A poem that stirred memories for me

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It’s about “The Land That Made Me Me”

I was sent this from one of our readers that made me smile and it did bring back many memories.

Without apologies I am going to share it with you.

I have searched on the Internet to try and find the author without success.

It seems to have been making the rounds since 2007.

The Land That Made Me ME

Long ago and far away,

In a land that time forgot,

Before the day of Dylan

Or the dawn of Camelot

There lived a race of innocents

And they were you and me.

Ike was in the White House

In that land where we were born

Where navels were for oranges

And Peyton Place was porn.

We learned to drive in drivers-ed

Washed our hair at dawn

We spread our crinolines to dry

In circles, on the lawn.

We longed for love and romance

And waited for our prince

And Eddie Fisher married Liz

And no one’s seen him since.

We danced to Little Darlin’

And sang to

And cried for

In the land that made me ME.

Only girls wore earrings then

We wore two, but never three

And only in our wildest dreams

Did we expect to see

A boy named George with lipstick

In the land that made me ME.

We had our share of heroes

We never thought they’d go

At least not

Or Marilyn Monroe.

For youth was still eternal

And life was yet to be

And Elvis was forever

In the land that made me ME.

We’d never seen a rock band

That was Grateful to be Dead

And Airplanes weren’t named Jefferson

And Zepplins were not Led.

And Beatles lived in gardens then

And Monkeys lived in trees

And Madonna was Mary

In the land that made me ME.

We never heard of microwaves

Or telephones in cars

And babies might be bottle fed

But they weren’t grown in jars.

Pumping iron was to get the wrinkles out

And “gay” meant fancy-free

Texting was for school books

In the land that made me ME.

We hadn’t seen enough of jets

To talk about the lag

And microchips were what was left

At the bottom of the bag.

Buicks came with portholes

And side-shows came with freaks

And bathing suits were big enough

To cover both your cheeks!!

Coke came just in bottles

Bytes came from a flea

Twitter was a bird song

In the land that made me ME.

We never saw only ONE movie

And water was always free

They never mentioned bodily dysfunctions

On prime-time TV.

And middle age was 35

And old was fifty three

And ancient were our grandparents

In the land that made me ME.

But all things have a season

Or so we’ve heard them say

Now instead of Maybelline

It’s Botox and Retin-A.

They send us invitations

To join AARP

It’s sure a long way baby

From the land that made me ME.

So now we face a new tech world

In slightly larger jeans

And wonder why they’re using

Smaller print in magazines.

And we tell our children’s children

Of the way it used to be

Long ago and far away

In the land that made me ME.

END

Of course the poem is ridiculous and doesn’t past the facts test. Never-the-less I enjoyed it and could relate to all of it. I hope you did, too.

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